Common Mistakes to Avoid During Your Divorce

There’s a reason a divorce can be emotionally exhausting. It can require months of making one life-changing decision after another, from choosing where your kids will live to negotiating for all your most valuable assets. It’s a cruel irony that you have to make such important choices while you’re going through the emotional breakup of your marriage. That unfortunate combination has led countless people to make decisions about their divorce process that they later regret.

Our experienced divorce attorneys at Oxendine Law have been guiding clients through the process for a combined 25 years. Put our expertise to good use and avoid these common divorce missteps.

Attempting a DIY Divorce

The internet puts so much information at our fingertips, and it allows people to learn about a wide range of subjects. The problem is that it’s no replacement for a formal education and specialized experience. Even if you’re a bright, educated individual and a fast learner, it’s never wise to handle your divorce without a lawyer. A divorce is a complex legal process that requires a knowledgeable professional who can navigate every detail of the journey.

Along those same lines, it’s also important not to take on tasks beyond what you’ve discussed with your divorce lawyer. For instance, don’t go to your spouse and try to negotiate deals without your lawyer knowing. You and your lawyer are on the same page and you don’t want to unknowingly say something that will put you in a difficult legal spot.

Trying to Hide Assets

It’s understandable to want to keep as many of your assets as possible without splitting them with your spouse. Still, it’s never worth the risk to try to hide assets. Chances are that your spouse knows you better than almost anyone else, and that means they know your tricks. You’re likely to get caught and when you do, you could be looking at legal ramifications, not to mention losing credibility and favor with the judge. It is best to make sure your attorney is fully aware of every asset that exists, no matter how large or small, so that you can get the best advice about how those assets should be divided.

Losing Sight of the Big Picture

Some divorces are amicable and both spouses have come to the decision that the marriage isn’t working. Other divorces have far more anger and conflict involved. Sometimes people let their emotions get the best of them and they fight over every minor detail and each small item they own purely for the sake of fighting. It’s important to remember your ultimate goal: resolving the divorce so you can get on with your life. If you and your spouse have kids, it’s even more important to keep the fighting under control in service of that ultimate goal. This is one more reason a divorce attorney can help: by keeping you focused on the big picture.

Over-Communicating or Over-Sharing with Your Spouse

The conversations you have with your attorney are confidential for a reason and they are meant to be private.  Often clients try to repeat what they were told by their attorney to their spouse.  This is risky not only because you may accidentally convey incorrect information, but also because it can give away important legal strategies. It is always best to keep the lines of communication open during a divorce, and it is especially essential if you share children.  However, when it comes to talking about the specific issues and details about the divorce, upcoming court appearances, settlement offers, or other legal issues, it is always best to simply say, “Let my attorney handle that.”    

Above all, the most important thing you can do for yourself during your divorce is to take the process seriously. Things that seem small at first can snowball into major legal issues or regrettable decisions down the line. From the start, work with an experienced divorce attorney you can trust to help you through the process as smoothly and easily as possible. If you’re ready to take that step, call Oxendine Law to schedule a meeting.